THE CITY OF LOS ANGELES HIGH SCHOOL MATH PROFICIENCY EXAM
1. Johnny has an AK-47 with a 30 round clip. He usually misses 6 out of every 10 shots and he uses 13 rounds per drive-by shooting. How many drive-by shootings can Johnny attempt before he has to reload?
2. Jose has 2 ounces of cocaine. If he sells an 8 ball to Antonio for $320 and 2 grams to Juan for $85 per gram, what is the street value of the rest of his hold?
3. Rufus pimps 3 ho's. If the price is $85 per trick, how many tricks per day must each ho turn to support Rufus's $800 per day crack habit?
4. Jerome wants to cut the pound of cocaine he bought for $40,000 to make 20% profit. How many ounces will he need?
5. Willie gets $200 for a stolen BMW, $150 for stealing a Corvette, and $100 for a 4x4. If he steals 1 BMW, 2 Corvettes and 3 4x4's, how many more Corvettes must he have to steal to have $900?
6. Raoul got 6 years for murder. He also got $10,000 for the hit. If his common-law wife spends $100 per month, how much money will be left when he gets out? Extra credit bonus: How much more time will he get for killing the ho that spent his money?
7. If an average can of spray paint covers 22 square feet and the average letter is 3 square feet, how many letters can be sprayed with 3 eight ounce cans of spray paint with 20% paint free?
8. Hector knocked up 3 girls in the gang. There are 27 girls in his gang. What is the exact percentage of girls Hector knocked up?
9. Bernie is a lookout for the gang. Bernie has a boa constrictor that eats 3 small rats per week at a cost of $5 per rat. If Bernie makes $700 a week as a lookout, how many weeks can he feed the boa on one week's income?
10. Billy steals Joe's skateboard. As Billy skates away at 35 mph, Joe loads his 357 Magnum. If it takes Joe 20 seconds to load his magnum, how far away will Billy be when he gets whacked?
The two criminal masterminds planned their heist carefully. They knew the courier would have a suitcase full of cash. They waited for his car to pass, then pursued him at high speed, shooting at the vehicle until the courier was forced to pull over.
Armed robbers made off with what they thought was a suitcase full of cash - they were in for a surprise. Back at their secret hideout, the bandits prepared to force the locks and spring the cash. That's when they noticed their plan had gone horribly wrong; instead of taking the money, they made off with a first aid kit.
Police spokesman Johann Steinlitz said, 'If there was an award for the dumbest crooks they would certainly be in the running.
But even though they did not get what they were after, we are still investigating for attempted armed robbery and endangering lives. Luckily the courier was not harmed in the incident.'
Armed robbers made off with what they thought was a suitcase full of cash - they were in for a surprise. Back at their secret hideout, the bandits prepared to force the locks and spring the cash. That's when they noticed their plan had gone horribly wrong; instead of taking the money, they made off with a first aid kit.
Police spokesman Johann Steinlitz said, 'If there was an award for the dumbest crooks they would certainly be in the running.
But even though they did not get what they were after, we are still investigating for attempted armed robbery and endangering lives. Luckily the courier was not harmed in the incident.'
A bungling burglar in the USA has been arrested after he left his mobile phone on charge at the house of one of his victims. The man was disturbed while rifling through rooms in the house in Washington DC and jumped out of a window to escape Will and Guy have learned.
Police searched the house later and were surprised to find a cell phone, that didn't belong to anyone at the house, charging in a socket.
Officers called one of the numbers in his contacts, told them the phone owner had been involved in an accident and asked for his name. That led to the 25 year old man being arrested and later charged with ten burglaries.
A 'would be' robber had to drop his bank looting plans after he forgot to take with him a bag into which the stolen money could be put.
Apparently, the young man in his 20's, entered a local Chase Bank branch early on Monday morning and passed the cashier a piece of cardboard on which was written 'Give me your money,' reported the Detroit News.
He told the bank teller to 'hurry up,' but when she asked him if he had a bag to put the money into he became flustered and confused and ran off without the cash.
Police searched the house later and were surprised to find a cell phone, that didn't belong to anyone at the house, charging in a socket.
Officers called one of the numbers in his contacts, told them the phone owner had been involved in an accident and asked for his name. That led to the 25 year old man being arrested and later charged with ten burglaries.
A 'would be' robber had to drop his bank looting plans after he forgot to take with him a bag into which the stolen money could be put.
Apparently, the young man in his 20's, entered a local Chase Bank branch early on Monday morning and passed the cashier a piece of cardboard on which was written 'Give me your money,' reported the Detroit News.
He told the bank teller to 'hurry up,' but when she asked him if he had a bag to put the money into he became flustered and confused and ran off without the cash.
BOULDER, Colo. — Police said a Boulder man who told police he woke up to a "bang" and realized he suffered a gunshot wound to his knee likely shot himself while sleepwalking.
- The Daily Camera reported that 63-year-old Sanford Rothman told investigators he had no clear recollection of the incident early Tuesday morning. No one else was in Rothman's home at the time.
Boulder police Sgt. Paul Reichenback said that Rothman keeps a 9 mm handgun near his bed and takes presciption medication for pain. Police said no alcohol or illegal drugs played a role in the incident.
Rothman was treated at a hospital and released.